Growing, Learning, and Enjoying Every Part Of It.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Things

I really appreciate the kind words AND actions by some of you yesterday.  I gave myself all of Monday and some of Tuesday to be sad, and now I'm back to reality. I'm standing in faith.  Not just that, I've thanked God and will continue to thank Him for not allowing us to conceive in January. He knows way more than I do, and if He doesn't think it is the right time, then I know he is either protecting or preparing us. Either way, I'm grateful.  It's easier to see that when I get out of my emotions and turn to the promises of God.

So, we will be back on the horse this month, trying some more. And, when the time comes, I will rejoice loudly :).

Again, thank you all for your support. I don't talk about trying to conceive with anyone other than my husband and the blog, so to read kind words and to see sweet acts really do warm my heart.

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As I'm still meditating on Ecclesiates 3: 1-8, I'm trying to apply this to every area of my life, not just TTC. Right now I think it's safe to say that I don't enjoy anything about my job other than my assistant. She is a gem in a sea of chaos. About every third day I think about putting in my two week notice. I have tried and continue to try to find some peace in this place. I try to understand that I am here for a reason, and that I need to fulfill that reason before I move on. I'm lost, though.

I'm not motivated here anymore. I've never thought I needed someone to "like" me, but in a sense I do. My work is an extension of me, and if I don't feel like my work is valued, I'm unhappy. 

I've tried to stop complaining about this to my husband, and I think I only bring it up every couple of weeks, but he can see that it is impacting me. 

I just can't walk away without having something else lined up. It must be the messages of my granny that were drilled into me for so many years. "Don't leave a job before you have another one. You won't be pissin' nobody off, but yo'self."

The time will come, and my season here will end. I am trying to rest in that promise.
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I brought on an intern for my Event Planning Firm.  She started this week, and she is already doing a great job.  She has a great proactive attitude.  And, I love the internship program I've developed. I am making sure she walks away learning some tangible skills.

This business is bringing me great joy.

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One of my goals for this year and life going forward is to really give attention to the relationships I value and to move away from those that I don't. I've made steps to do that with my mother. I've also moved away from one person that I don't think is genuine. Moving away hasn't been difficult at all.

I'm also trying to give attention to my rekindled frienship. It feels a bit weird, though.  She recently mailed me a hand written letter that said she looked forward to us re-learning each other. That seemed weird to me because we only stopped communication for 4.5 months. Anyway, I do love her and I'm hopeful that our relationship will return to what it was.

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I need one more picture to finish my new vision board. It was amazing how God worked and saw that I accomplished everything on my other one. Amazing!

That's all for now. An updated juicing post is coming soon. I have been drinking some yummy concoctions!



1 comment:

LadyLee said...

I see something unfolding here. Personally, I think you will understand this whole timing later on. Interesting...

I want to borrow a line of this for my birthday post tomorrow, if you don't mind.

"One of my goals for this year and life going forward is to really give attention to the relationships I value and to move away from those that I don't."

That perfectly describes me. Really. But I didn't know the words to express that.

I'm not particularly motivated by my job either, hon. I've been doing chemistry for 26 years. That is a LONG time. So I understand when your job begins to lose it's flavor. I am happy for the new business you have. That is your saving grace there.